160 Friendship Funny Quotes – Scan to Talk (2024)

by CharlotteLeave a Comment on 160 Friendship Funny Quotes

You know, there’s nothing quite like friendship to bring a smile to your face, especially when it comes complete with its own collection of hilarious quotes.

I mean, where else can you find the kind of honesty that’s only sweetened by a good laugh?

Whether it’s about borrowing your best friend’s favorite dress and never returning it, or those late-night talks that somehow turn into a roast session, friendship is a treasure trove of funny moments.

And let’s be honest, it’s these moments, wrapped up in quotes, that really tell the story of our friendships—the kind of stories that are too good not to share.

160 Friendship Funny Quotes

1. “Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.”
2. “We’ll be the old ladies causing trouble in the nursing homes.”
3. “I don’t know what’s tighter, our jeans or our friendship.”
4. “Finding friends with the same mental disorder: priceless!”
5. “I’m not really your friend until I start insulting you on a daily basis.”
6. “I’d take a bullet for you. Not in the head. But like, in the leg or something.”
7. “Good friends don’t let you do stupid things… alone.”
8. “We’ve been friends for so long, I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.”
9. “Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay, like an octopus on your face.”
10. “I think we’ll be friends forever because we’re too lazy to find new friends.”
11. “You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend. I’ll train you.”
12. “Real friends don’t get offended when you insult them. They smile and call you something even more offensive.”
13. “You and I are more than friends. We’re like a really small gang.”
14. “Friendship is like peeing yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling it brings.”
15. “Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.”
16. “A good friend will help you move. But a best friend will help you move a body.”
17. “I’ll always be there for you. I’ll even be there for you when you’re not there for yourself.”
18. “We’re not friends. We’re a highly exclusive club of awesomeness.”
19. “You’re the friend I’d feel the worst about killing in a post-apocalyptic death match for food.”
20. “I love that our effortless friendship fits perfectly with my laziness.”
21. “The most memorable people in life will be the friends who loved you when you weren’t very lovable.”
22. “A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.”
23. “I hope we’re friends until we die. And then I hope we stay ghost friends and walk through walls and scare the crap out of people.”
24. “Friendship is, hiding their stuff and watching them go nuts.”
25. “True friendship is when you walk into their house, and your WiFi connects automatically.”
26. “Friendship is having those your conversations with your best friend and thinking if anyone heard you, you’d be put in a mental hospital.”
27. “We’re like the super friends. We’re a highly animated group.”
28. “A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship.”
29. “We’ll be best friends forever because you already know too much.”
30. “Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh.”
31. “I’m not a good friend. I’m a terrific friend. I don’t need inspirational quotes. I need coffee.”
32. “If you have friends who are as weird as you, then you have everything.”
33. “Friends buy you lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.”
34. “Everyone has that one annoying friend. If you don’t have one, it’s probably you.”
35. “Best friends know how crazy you are and still choose to be seen with you in public.”
36. “I love that we can look at each other and without saying anything, know we are making fun of the same person.”
37. “A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
38. “We are going to be really cool old ladies.”
39. “Having those weird conversations with your friend and thinking, ‘If anyone heard us, we’d be in a mental hospital.’”
40. “Life is too short to be serious all the time. If you can’t laugh at yourself, call me—I’ll laugh at you.”

41. “Finding a friend with the same level of crazy isn’t a friendship, it’s a miracle.”
42. “Good friends don’t let you do stupid things… alone.”
43. “Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel its warmth.”
44. “Friends are like stars, they come and go, but the ones that stay are the ones that glow.”
45. “A best friend is someone who makes you laugh even when you think you’ll never smile again.”
46. “Friends are therapists you can drink with.”
47. “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.”
48. “Friendship is, hiding their snack wrappers in your pocket because they forgot theirs at home.”
49. “We all have that one friend who never learned how to whisper.”
50. “I was an innocent being, then my best friend came along.”
51. “You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend, but it helps.”
52. “Friendship is finding that special someone you can enjoy being a dumbass with.”
53. “A good friend is like a four-leaf clover; hard to find and lucky to have.”
54. “Weird is when you have as much fun at each other’s house doing nothing as you do at an amusem*nt park.”
55. “A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.”
56. “Friends are the siblings God never gave us.”
57. “A best friend is like a good bra: hard to find, supportive, comfortable, and always close to your heart.”
58. “You don’t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you can be certain of.”
59. “Friendship is not about who you have known the longest; it’s about who walked into your life, said, ‘I’m here for you,’ and proved it.”
60. “Friends pick us up when we fall down, and if they can’t pick us up, they lie down and listen for a while.”
61. “Friendship is so weird…you just pick a human you’ve met and you’re like ‘Yep, I like this one’ and you just do stuff with them.”
62. “It’s the friends you can call at 4 a.m. that matter.”
63. “My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me.”
64. “Friends are the chocolate chips in the cookie of life.”
65. “Friends give you a shoulder to cry on. But best friends are ready with a shovel to hurt the person that made you cry.”
66. “True friends don’t judge each other. They judge other people together.”
67. “A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.”
68. “Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.”
69. “Best friends are the people in your life that make you laugh louder, smile brighter, and live better.”
70. “I think we’ll be friends forever because we’re too lazy to find new friends.”
71. “Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.”
72. “Having a best friend is like having your own little corner of the world to escape to.”
73. “Here’s to the nights that turned into mornings with the friends that turned into family.”
74. “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.”
75. “The most memorable people in life will be the friends who loved you when you weren’t very lovable.”
76. “Side by side or miles apart, real friends are always close to the heart.”
77. “A best friend is someone who loves you when you forget to love yourself.”
78. “Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together.”
79. “Some people go to priests; others to poetry; I to my friends.”
80. “Life was meant for good friends and great adventures.”

81. “Friends are the siblings God never gave us.”
82. “Friendship is a wildly underrated medication.”
83. “A single rose can be my garden… a single friend, my world.”
84. “In the cookie of life, friends are the chocolate chips.”
85. “A good friend knows all your stories. A best friend helped you write them.”
86. “Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.”
87. “A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.”
88. “Good friends are like stars. You don’t always see them, but you know they’re always there.”
89. “Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.”
90. “True friendship comes when the silence between two people is comfortable.”
91. “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.”
92. “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'”
93. “No friendship is an accident.”
94. “Friends are the family you make.”
95. “The best time to make friends is before you need them.”
96. “True friends are always together in spirit.”
97. “Life is nothing without friendship.”
98. “Friends are the mirrors reflecting the truth of who we are.”
99. “To the world, you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.”
100. “Friendship multiplies the good of life and divides the evil.”
101. “It’s not what we have in life, but who we have in our life that matters.”
102. “A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still, gently allows you to grow.”
103. “Every new friend is a new adventure… the start of more memories.”
104. “The greatest gift of life is friendship, and I have received it.”
105. “A friend is what the heart needs all the time.”
106. “Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness.”
107. “The language of friendship is not words but meanings.”
108. “It takes a long time to grow an old friend.”
109. “A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.”
110. “Friends are the sunshine of life.”
111. “There’s nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.”
112. “Friendship is the golden thread that ties the heart of all the world.”
113. “The antidote for fifty enemies is one friend.”
114. “In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity, we know our friends.”
115. “A true friend is someone who is there for you when they would rather be anywhere else.”
116. “Friendship isn’t about whom you have known the longest… It’s about who came, and never left your side.”
117. “True friends are like diamonds – bright, beautiful, valuable, and always in style.”
118. “Friends are the anchors that hold us steady when the waves of life are crashing around us.”
119. “A real friend is someone who would feel loss if you jumped on a train, or in front of one.”
120. “Friends are those who know you as you are, understand where you have been, accept what you have become, and still gently allow you to grow.”

121. “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.”
122. “Friendship multiplies the good of life and divides its evils.”
123. “True friendship comes when the silence between two people is comfortable.”
124. “Friends are the family you choose.”
125. “A friendship that can end never really began.”
126. “Friendship is a sheltering tree.”
127. “The best mirror is an old friend.”
128. “Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.”
129. “Friends are the siblings God never gave us.”
130. “A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails.”
131. “Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.”
132. “They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.”
133. “Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them… your smile, your hope, and your courage.”
134. “A good friend is a connection to life – a tie to the past, a road to the future, the key to sanity in a totally insane world.”
135. “No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.”
136. “Friends are the chocolate chips in the cookie of life.”
137. “A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.”
138. “Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends leave footprints in your heart.”
139. “To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may be the world.”
140. “Friendship is the only cement that will ever hold the world together.”
141. “True friends are never apart, maybe in distance, but never in heart.”
142. “Friendship is like a rainbow between two hearts.”
143. “A friend is one who overlooks your broken fence and admires the flowers in your garden.”
144. “Some people arrive and make such a beautiful impact on your life, you can barely remember what life was like without them.”
145. “A single rose can be my garden… a single friend, my world.”
146. “Friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief.”
147. “It’s not what we have in life, but who we have in our life that matters.”
148. “Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity.”
149. “Friends are the most important ingredient in the recipe of life.”
150. “Real friendship is when your friend comes over to your house and then you both just take a nap.”
151. “No friendship is an accident.”
152. “A friend is someone who makes it easy to believe in yourself.”
153. “Friends are the roses of life: pick them carefully and avoid the thorns.”
154. “There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends.”
155. “Good friends are like stars. You don’t always see them, but you know they’re always there.”
156. “A true friend is the greatest of all blessings.”
157. “Friendship is the wine of life.”
158. “Life without friendship is like the sky without the sun.”
159. “Friends are the family you choose.”
160. “The real test of friendship is can you literally do nothing with the other person? Can you enjoy those moments of life that are utterly simple?”